True leadership is lonely (My reflection)

 True leadership is lonely. When you're leading with integrity, fairness, and vision, you're often making decisions others don’t fully understand — or want to resist. You’re carrying responsibility that most people can’t see, and balancing expectations from all directions: students, parents, teachers, the ministry, the community.

And when you lead with compassion, it becomes even lonelier. Why? Because you’re not just doing the job; you’re feeling it. You see your teachers’ burdens. You carry your students’ struggles. You try to be available, to listen, to support. And yet, when difficult decisions must be made — when boundaries must be drawn — you become the target of disappointment or even resentment.

It’s hard. And it’s human.

Many people confuse kindness with naivety, and compassion with passivity. But leadership with heart is not weakness — its strength with courage. Still, those who are insecure or self-serving may see your empathy as something to manipulate.

Sometimes, when people see you putting others first, they assume you won’t put your foot down. And when you eventually do — because you must — it creates discomfort. They don’t understand that compassion isn’t about always saying yes; it’s about doing what’s right, even when it’s hard.

Because leadership requires standing in the middle of tension. You're not just enforcing policies — you're mediating between what’s ideal and what’s possible. Teachers may see you as too administrative. 

Administrators may see you as too soft. And when you try to lead with heart, that middle space becomes even harder. You may be misunderstood because  you are holding people accountable gently, not forcefully. You may be misunderstood because you are showing empathy when others expect assertiveness. You may be misunderstood because you are also trying to build a culture, not just manage a system. But those efforts take time, and not everyone sees the value immediately. Leadership that builds culture is often unappreciated until it's gone.

The greatest leaders — in schools, in communities, in families — often walk quietly, without loud praise. Compassionate leadership doesn’t always get applause, but it leaves deep, lasting impact.

You may not be seen clearly right now, but you are doing the work. And that matters. 

To all the leaders out there...You are not alone in this.