The sleep of eternity

A girl was walking in the rain. Her clothes clung in her body and she was dripping from head to toe. She cursed her luck for being there. She hadn’t planned to be there but fate plays strange tricks sometimes. She was meant to be in her cozy room sipping coffee in at that time but the sudden change in weather and some mechanical failure in her car took her to that place.

She had left her office and driven to her home when her car broke down in the middle of the road. She reached for her cell to call for a mechanic only to find the battery of her cell dead. Damn! She cursed her luck and kicked her car. She decided to walk to the nearest telephone booth to call for help and had walked a few distance when the fury of the heaven broke down on her drenching her. She ran for shelter to the nearest tree and sat underneath but she the downpour became heavier and it began to get dark. She was afraid because she had never walked that road though she had driven everyday to her work.

She started cursing and praying at the same time. She wished for a car to pass by so that she could ask for a lift but it looked like the folks were scared to come out in torrent rain. She was cold and tired but continued to walk towards her destination and it seemed ages before she saw the silhouette of the telephone booth. She heaved a sigh of relief and dashed towards it. As she ran, a car screech in front of her and she was blinded by a powerful beam of light. She screamed and covered her face in reflex.

Everything happened in a flash of light. She heard a murmur and felt someone lifting her up and taking her towards the waiting car. After that she lost her consciousness and the next thing she remembered was waking up in the hospital. She saw her neighbour sitting on a chair beside her bed and tried to recollect how she came to the place she hated the most. She had vowed never to visit that place a year ago when she lost the only person she cared about in that place.

She slowly looked around and saw another person in the room - A stranger. As she turned, the stranger smiled and came towards her. She gave a quizzical look so the stranger explained to her with guilt that she was in a motor accident and he was responsible for it.

She wanted to ask him how he found her neighbour but she couldn’t open her mouth. She raised her hand to feel her face only to feel her bandaged face. It was only then she realized that she could not move her legs. She must have been a pathetic sight. She wanted to know how long she had been there on the bed but she had no means of knowing that until the bandage on her face were pulled out. She looked at the calendar beside her bed but didn’t get a clue on what the day was. The stranger spoke slowly and explained that she had been in the hospital for the last three days. She began to panic as she realized that she had been absent from her work for three days and her superior had not been intimated. The stranger might have read her thought for he said that he had informed her office about her accident. She wanted to curse him but didn’t have the energy to do so. The fatigue won over her and she drifted to sleep.

She saw her mother singing her the lullaby that she used to sing while putting her to sleep as a child. She felt childish with her mother once again. She felt something was not right yet she had no control over what was happening. She might have been delirious and talking nonsense for the neighbour started calling her name over and over again. She heard a faint call from her neighbour and tried to respond to him but her mother’s song was so more powerful.

She felt the urge to be with her mother more than anything else in the whole world and smiled as she listened to her mother’s song.

She did not feel the doctors in the hospital trying frantically to revive her breathing and calling her name. The stranger at the corner of the room was feeling faint as he saw his victim breathing her last…

(PS: please note that this is a work of fiction)

A complete woman.

“Am I a complete woman?” I asked myself when a friend said I had to acquire a driving license in order to be complete. I asked my other friends about the same and many had different opinion on being complete. Some said, one needs a family to be complete, others said they need to have a secured job in order to be complete.

Different people had different view on being complete. And Yes I needed to be complete. I had to acquire a driving license. I left earlier from my work and headed to the regional RSTA office to practice for my test which I had been delaying due to one reason or other. My friends had been urging me to get it done before I got into trouble with the RSTA.  And it so happened that one Saturday my husband was driving me and my children to school when we bumped into the people from RSTA doing their routine high way checking. I thanked my lucky star for I was not on the steering wheels that day as I normally do which saved me from embarrassment.

I asked a friend of mine to accompany me and we practiced inside the D-box for about half an hour. The RSTA officials asked me to come for the test the next day at 9 O’clock in the morning.

I had a sleepless night for I was thinking of what might happen the following day. I didn’t want to be a laughingstock in if I failed in the test. I got ready and went for the test at 8.30; half an hour before the time and got busy with the practice. At 9.00, I was called in the office for written test which wrote within 5 minutes since it was all multiple choice questions with the options given.

The next was the most difficult part. Most of my friends had talked about their experience in the D-box and I was quite nervous but I pretended to be calm. The officials were watching me drive in the box from all the angle and I felt like a prisoner with all the guards eyeing my escape. After about an eternity, I could finally come out of the box and I heaved a sigh of relief when all the people watching me drive applauded me.

And then I was taken for highway drive which was not a problem and at the end I was asked to come for a refresher’s course the following Friday which I attended. Now I hold a valid driving license and I cannot help smiling when I remember the conversation I had with another friend who suggested me to take some bottle of beer to get through the test.

Yes, if acquiring a driving license makes one a complete, then I am a complete woman now.

My sister Jane

After sometime I finally made up my mind, she was the one and I really wanted to make her mine. I had all the reasons to be with her. She had been there for me every time I wanted a shoulder to cry on or a joy to share with. She never failed me.

I had met her during my first year in my high school. She was a tiny little girl with a thick pair of glasses. Everyone in the campus called her "sister Jane" and I too did that until I finally got to know her better.

I was participating in the house debate and my house captain teamed me with the sister Jane. The first practice session progressed without any exchange of words between us but as days passed we began to discuss and scaffold the strength of one another and we made a very good progress. Even the house master was impressed with our work and we won the inter house debate competition.

During our times together I saw a girl with a dream beyond my means, a girl capable of passion which I was not aware of and a friendship I had never dreamt of. I took our friendship for granted and never kept any secrets from her. I had many up and downs in my relationship with other girls but I always went to her when I needed a shoulder to cry on. She would always be there with her ever knowing words to console me and help me over come the breakup.

We completed our high schools and went on to pursue our dreams but we never lost our contact. We always found time to exchange mails and calls. At times when she did not respond mails or made calls I would be frantic with worries and my friends would tease me that I was being irrational. My girl friends were jealous when I shared about our friendship but I would always argue saying that there is nothing more than a friendship between us.

At times I would wonder whether there was something more than a friendship between us and I had no answer for that.

Then I met her during the graduate orientation. At first I couldn't recognize her when she called my name. Her glasses were replaced by contract lenses and her feature looked more famine. I stood there speechless. I now had the answer that had been probing for ages� "Yes, she is more than a friend to me". I kept that realization to myself because I did not want to spoil the friendship that we had.  The orientation was over within the blink of eyes and we sat for the civil service examination. The results were declared and we both got selected.

I then decided that she was the one with whom I wanted to spend the rest of my life with. I got a small ring with an inscription "MY SISTER JANE" and drove to her house and rang thedoor bell. She was all smile when she saw me and took my hand and said, "Rinzin, meet my fianc�e". I managed a meek smile and said "Hello" extending my hand to the man who stole my girl�..

 

A day in the life of a student

My day begins with the wake up call from my mother. She calls my name several times before I open the door and walk sleepily to the bathroom rubbing my eyes and murmuring something. Some times my mother hears my murmur and asks me what I said to which I pretend not to hear her and continue with my sluggish walk to the bathroom. Once inside I relieve my bladders of its burden without closing the door and my mother screams at me asking me to at least have the decency to close the door of the bathroom. The next I clutch my tooth brush and start squeezing the paste from all the sides making the tube shapeless. I know my mother would get mad when she sees that but I like to be shabby most of the time and she forgives me every time.

Its almost my breakfast time when I get out of the bathroom and my sisters grumbles at me saying that we are getting late for the school. I take my gho to my father who dresses me up and my breakfast is ready on the table when I am done with the dressing.

I quickly eat my breakfast and grab my school bag and my packed lunch basket from the table and walk to the waiting car. I check my bag in the car to make sure that all the things are there. My sister looks at me accusingly sending me a message that I should be more responsible. I make a silent promise that I will get up early the next day to avoid her accusing looks. The drive takes 10 minutes to get to my school and all my friends are already in the school. I get out of the car and join my friends.

The school bell rings and I follow my friends to the assembly ground and pray the "Jamyang Soeldep" which is followed by the speeches, announcements and finally the national anthem. After that I move to my class and sit cramped in the small classroom in between two noisy girls.

The class teacher moves in lazily and takes our attendance not bothering whether we are comfortable or not. After that begins my torment. I try to listen to every word my teacher says but I am unable to concentrate because the girls on my both sides and busy whispering between the teaching by the teacher. The teaching continues despite the whispering and I hear the bell which indicates that the next period is Mathematics which is my favourite subject. I wait for the teacher to enter with my books open and look around to see some of my friends dozing off due to hot weather. I control my laughter because I know that the boys are going to be annoyed with my laughing and I am looking for trouble during the recess. Mathematics period is over within a blink of eye and its time for break. I look into the lunch basket and find my favourite snacks that my mother never fails to pack. I take my snacks and hide it inside my gho and go outside the class and share it with my friends.

The ten minute break gets over very soon and I am back to the class for science. I wish the teacher would take us to the lab because I love experimenting when it comes to science.

I dread the fourth period because the teacher who teaches Dzongkha is very strict. Once I was not able to pronounce some words correctly and after that I had become her target. That's the reason I stay late at night practicing reading Dzongkha. The period moves at snail's pace and my stomach rumbles... I pray for the bell to ring earlier to save myself from embarrassment.

The lunch hours are my best moment in the school. I take my lunch with my friends quickly and we play in the heat till we sweat. We smell all sweaty when we enter the class after the lunch. And then begins our dozing session. At the end of the day my head feels like it had been pricked by thousand nails due to the noise made my by desk mate. And eardrum is at the verge of bursting. I look at the final bell  with relief.

By 3.30 pm, I am all set to go back home and wait at the school gate for my mother.

When I get home, I throw off my gho, put on my regular jeans and go out to my waiting friends. I spend about an hour with my friends and I get back home for my home work because my mother is very strict with our study schedule. I sometimes wonder whether I attend two schools in a day.

 

Faceless friend

A message reads… "Can u be online this Friday? I have to talk to you". The responder answers, "I can't promise but will try".

The sender is a young girl who has been frequenting the net for the last couple of months. She needed to have her last chat with this faceless stranger. She eagerly waits for the Friday evening when her chat friend would be online.

She is very punctual. She sits in front of the computer in a café and fiddles the computer for some time to pass her time. She logs in at exactly 6 pm and sees that her friend is online. A smile crosses her face and she starts typing to her faceless friend. She had been sharing everything about her to this faceless friend that she had come to trust the person on the other side of the line like her twin soul. She respondent gives her all the advice that she need and she always feels light hearted after the chat with her friend.

But today she didn't have a problem. She had made her decision. She hadn't been online for more than a month. She had failed to qualify for her next higher grade and the most important person in her life had left her. Her sister had asked her to continue in a private school but she feels that her world had ended after the departure of the only person whom she had come to rely on. She needed some one to listen to her but her sister had no time to listen to her childish outburst. So she was depressed and wanted everything to end for her.

"Hi, thanks for being online. I just wanted to say hi to you. I may not be able to do that after today."

"are u going somewhere?"

"no but I think I may not be available after today"

"so do u mean to say that u will be busy?"

"no but I don't think I would be able to come online after today"

"ok but why? Any problem?"

She pauses and writes "I hate everyone. My life sucks"

The stranger writes "hey… you can talk to me if u like. I m listening" and listens to her outburst. She writes, "I am very much depressed. I have no will to live anymore. My father just left my mother for another woman. I hate him but my mother says he left since he was not happy with her. Can u believe that?"

The stranger does not have right word to console the girl. He just tells her to continue her story. He is just thinking of how to help the poor kid on the other side of the line.

The girl continues "I even hate my mother for letting my father go away from us. She could have told us if they had some problem. But my sister says, they weren't happy with each other and it was better they went separate ways. Now if they weren't happy with each other, why would they stick to each other for all these years?"

" May be they wanted you to grow old enough to understand".

" U too sound like them."

"do I?  I m sorry if I had offended u but I was just being truthful"

"Ok, but can you believe that my father is leaving us and going abroad. I won't be seeing him for many years. He says he wanted to take me but his new wife doesn't want any of his kids around and he chooses that bitch over his very own kids. Now I hate all of them".

"Hey, u can't go on hating them all. Can u?"

"Yes I can, if I have to".

"Do u really want to turn into someone looks at the world with hatred?"

"mmm I am not sure"

"then U admit that u don't hate them."

" Yes, I don't hate them always but right now, I hate them all"

"this phase of your life will pass, just give urself some time and try not to think of this issue though I know it is difficult".

" are u sure, it will pass?"

"Cross my heart, a time will come when u will even get to like your step mom"

"don't expect me to like her"

"ok"

"and there is another thing I want u to tell you about. I have failed to qualify for my next higher grade and I don't want to burden my sister and mother. They want me to continue in private school but I know how difficult it would be for them to meet the house hold expense"

"What do u really want? Do you want to continue with your studies or do you want something else?"

"I want to study but I also know that it would be next to impossible for my mother and sister to meet my school expense."

"mmm may be u can get the help from your dad"

"I am not even talking to my dad anymore and I don't want any help from him or his wife"

"well… what do u plan to do next?"

"I donno"

"well, u can take a good night sleep and talk to ur mother and sister about ur plans if u have any"

"May be I will just talk to them about how I feel. I haven't done much talking since my father left us. I felt so depressed that I thought I would lock myself up in the room and let the world end"

"Hey girl… cheer up, this is not the end of the world. There are so many things stored up for u. U just got to pull the right strings and things will start to tune in to ur tone"

The stranger gives her tips on how to keep herself occupied by reading some books and he gives her a list of books that she can borrow from the public library. She takes a note of all that and she leaves the café with a smile on her face.

The stranger doesn't realize that he had just saved a life from a fatal suicide. She had come all prepared to bid farewell to her chat friend and leaves the café with a determination to live no matter how tough her life turns out to be.

The tale of the lone figure

As I listened to her tale, I felt that I should write her story for I found it facinating.

Abi Gyanden (her name) was born in a poverty ridden home where there was always shortage of food. Her parents toiled from dawn till dust to feed the nine children. When she was old enough to venture outside her village, she ran away from home to escape hunger. When she first arrived at Tashigang, some one took her in as a maid and gave her food and shelter. She was 9 years old and she served the family until they decided to send her away to their relative in the capital.

The relatives of her first saviour were very kind and treated her like the member of the family. She led a peaceful life until a man came to the house to ask her hand in marriage. After the consent of the family, she was taken as a bride to a very affluent family. She was just thirteen years at that time. The family treated her well since she worked very hard to please everyone in the family. Before she attained 20 years of age, she was the mother of four children. By then her husband had started having numerous affairs and there was always disagreement in the house. She tried to flee form her husband but her in-laws did not permit that since they feared that they might loose their grand children. Her in-laws were very supportive and she enrolled her children in the school. She narrated how her husband once disappeared for more than a year and came back to her when he had exhausted all the money that he had taken from his parents.

She said that she was married legally to a man who did not bear any responsibility towards his family. She also said that she was thankful for her in-laws who stayed with her through thick and thin.

Then she took out something from her tiny sooth ridden bag and showed m. It was a photograph. Looking at it, I assumed that it might have been taken some years back. The faded photograph contained the pictures of laughing faces. On a closer look, I realized that I was staring at the picture of one of my old friend. She pointed at the picture and said that the girl in the picture was her youngest daughter. I gasp, "Yeasel". She looked at me quizzically and asked "How do u know her?" I said we were in the school together once but how could I tell that I knew her story before I even met her. I have heard Yeasel tell her story many a times and now all her memories came flooding after all those years.

I asked her why she stayed here when all her children were settled abroad. She said that she had to come back to the land of her birth because she wanted to die here. I had no response for her words� Hope Yeasel will realize this and come back to her mother sooner�

The Talk with the lone figure

I walked unsteadily, not knowing whether I was doing the right thing or not but I thought on what Gobsmacker wrote "One day when you make your usual walk, you will not find the old lady there...nor you will hear her frail voice chanting "Om Mani padme hung". So don't shy away today....tomorrow you may be too late...."  I decided it was now or never.

I walked hesitantly and sat beside her. She stopped chanting her prayers and looked at me. I took out doma which I had bought especially for her and offered to her. Her wrinkled face broke into a wide smile and she took it and asked me to have one as well which I declined saying that I don't chew it. She gave me another toothless smile as she put the remaining doma inside her sooth ridden tiny bag.

She sat there relishing the taste of her doma as I waited silently for her to finish it. After sometime, she finished chewing and asked me my name. And then began our conversation. She spoke with hefty breath and in between counted her rosary and chanted her prayers. As she narrated her life story, I listened with earnest interest that I even lost the track of time. It was dark as I took her leave that evening and I am looking forward to seeing her next…

The lone figure

Every evening as I go for walk, I see a lone figure with a rosary on her hand. She is seen chanting "OM MANI PADME HUNG" and I can see that her devotion is eternal. She always occupies the same bench in the park and she is seen there no matter what time I choose to visit the place. I am inclined to go and share some words with her but I shy away thinking that I might be intruding her sanctuary.

I sometimes occupy the place opposite to her and watch her as she continues with her chanting and prayers.  Her wrinkled face looks very calm and her stooped figure tells me that she might be in her late 70s.

After my usual walk, I find my self thinking about her and wondering where she stays. Her presence in the park every time I am there is so mystifying that I wish to know more about her and  I tell myself that I will talk to her the next day  and...

Towards unknown destination - II

We stayed for few days in the boarder town before travelling to the capital. In the capital, I was met by another cousin who wanted to take me with her.  In the cold February month, I was driven to a completely new place that I haven't even heard about. I had no idea what they wanted of me. At last I mustered some courage and asked what I had to do for her. She said that she wanted me to go to school like the other children of my age. That was best thing that ever happened to me. I started going to the school and I learned fast since I was older than the most of the students in my class.

At the end of the year, I made my benefactor proud by coming up first in the class. I tried my best in every activities carried out in the school and even succeeded in most of them. Then I decided something I regret till this day. I left my benefactor and went with my brother who was working by then. My brother took me to the place where he worked and treated me well but I fell sick constantly due to the unsuitable weather. My performance declined in the school and after a year I went back to my mother.

I continued my studies but my performance was not the same as what it used to be. I managed to pass my grade but I was not satisfied with the results. I knew the hardships my mother was facing to send me to school and I continued to help my mother at home after school to sustain our living because my father was of no help to us. I managed to get through in the high school and continued my studies in a reputed school. Despite my hard work, I did not qualify for Sherubtse and now my future looks bleak as I am looking for some job. My mother is no more there to support me….

Towards unknown destination I

I was the youngest in the family but I was not the favourite of my father. May be that was because I was not his planned baby. He already had a house full of kids from his first wife and I was just another mouth to feed for him. My brothers had learned to adjust with the mistreatment from our half siblings but I was just a child then.

My father thought that he needed someone to herd the cattle for the family and found me fit for the job. At the age of seven, when most of the children my age went to school, I was spending my days with the nature, herding the cattle.

One fine day, I heard that my cousins were coming home for their holidays. I hadn't met any of them since they worked in the capital. I was asked by my mother to get ready to go and see them since they wanted to meet me. I was very excited. We planned to visit them without the knowledge of my father because he didn't like us visiting them. A few days after their arrival to the village, I and my mother went to see them. They all welcomed us with their open hearts and they had a long talk with my mother. I was too small to understand what was going on. From that day, my mother started packing things silently and I felt the urge to ask but I could not. A week after our visit to the cousins place, my mother took me to the market on some pretext. I saw a car waiting and my mother told me to get inside. I saw my cousins inside the car and they drove me away, taking me away from my mother, the only person who cared for me.

That ride in the car was my first ride. I felt the trees moving and nauseous but my cousins assured me that it would be fine after sometime.  It was after many stops on the way that we reached the town. I saw the tall buildings for the first time. The hotel we stayed in was a very huge in comparison to the small hut where I and my mother along with my brothers stayed. (My father had a big palatial house which we hardly visited). After shower, my cousins took me to buy some dress for me. It was all like a dream for me. I was treated like a princess for the first time in my life. They wanted me to dress in pants and shirts which was very new experience to me. It took me sometime to get used to the dress.

The get together…

The two weeks that I was away from my family was the busiest one. The day started with a cup of coffee in the room (I was never on time for the breakfast due to late night assignments). And by half past eight I had to be in the class ready for the session. The session usually lasted for one hour session with different tutors and we had to attend seven sessions in a day. The lunch hours were the shortest one with less than an hour break. We met many friends from the training days but we never had enough time casually sit and talk. So a friend suggested that get together for dinner.

About twenty five of us agreed.  And despite our busy schedule and presentations, we did set a time and place to meet and we all met on the given date. We all had a great time. For a moment, we even forgot about the family we left at home. It was just like the training days when we never bothered about what the others said. There were lots of noise and drinks and some of us hardly touched dinner. After dinner, I ended up driving my friends back to their place and it was 2 O’clock in the morning when I finally got to my room.  What a night I had and the next day some of the friends ended up missing some sessions…

Happy Birthday…

I have been married for the last thirteen years and I have never been more in love with my husband than I am now. Today is his birthday and I and my kids had planned a small surprise for him but as luck would have it, he had to leave very early pertaining to his official work and he didn’t even had time to glance at the card which was carefully chosen by our daughter especially for him on the occasion. She had written wishes for her dad and waited for him to go to bed last night and placed the card underneath his cell phone because she knew that he would leave early and would not return until very late at night.

The first thing she asked when she got up was whether her dad had seen her card before he left for his work and I did not have a heart to spoil her day so I simply lied. I quickly called him to let him know about it and I could feel that he was sorry for hasting for his work without seeing the card. I know he is very busy with his work and sometimes I wish that he was just a simple teacher he used to be not the busy man he had become. But what ever he had become, we all love him even more and we are all waiting for him to return from his work to surprise him… HAPPY BIRTHDAY DEAR….

Me and my brothers

I was the fourth child in a big family. I don’t remember spending my early childhood with my two elder sisters mostly because they were away in the boarding school while I was learning to walk and talk. When they came on winter holidays, I remember looking at them like an intruder, intruding the haven we had because my mother would focus all her attention to the two sisters who had been away from home for most of the year.

My younger brother was my best friend. He was two year younger to me but we were of same height and I always ended up getting beaten by him almost everyday. But he was very protective when someone tried to bully me. In the school he was way junior to me because he got detained to some classes.

My elder brother was more of a bookworm. He hardly went out to play. I don’t remember him being sporty or playing any games. He was usually seen with a book on his lap and a music player.

And my youngest brother was my dad’s favourite.  He would get the best of gifts amongst all yet he was very scared of dad. He could never face my father during meals. He would usually occupy the place furthest from my dad’s place.

Now, we have all grown up and settled in our own life. We hardly have time like those good old days. Those good old days are gone beyond recall!

 It had been many years since I talked to my elder brother because he is busy with his life and his three kids. My younger brother tries to come often to meet me since he takes care of our parental home. My youngest brother is still single and getting old.

Will she ever find her happiness?

She looked at her baby on her lap and could not help the tears welling up. She just could not believe that anyone would shun the angle on her lap. The baby was sleeping peacefully not knowing the strain it had caused in the life of his mother. She thought that the birth of the baby would make her husband change his ways.

She had led a sheltered life until she was a teenager. Her mother and sisters were always there to protect her from all the evils and she had her way for everything she wanted. And she had her way when she met the man whom she thought as her knight in shining armor. If only she had listened to her mother and her sisters… Her family was against her marriage from the very beginning but she wanted to prove to them that she had made the right decision on marrying the man she wanted.

Her family could see that she was doomed for disaster but she was so blinded by the illusion that she didn’t see the devil in the man she married. She conceived her first child when she was still a student. She left the baby at home with her mother and continued her education ultimately getting herself employed. Life wasn’t a bed of roses for her… she had to face many hardships and learned to live with her husbands many illicit relationships. After two children, he still didn’t change. And she was planning for a divorce when she learnt that she was pregnant with the third child. She was doomed to live with the man who was more of a stranger than a husband.

The birth of the third child seemed to send them further apart. He briskly came to see her in the hospital and left the following day to play an archery tournament. A week later she took her children and left for her mother’s house to get healed but would the wound that has grown in her heart ever heal? Would she ever get her share of happiness?

Getting settled in the boarder town…

I have recently shifted to the boarder town which I find is very noisy and dusty. I guess that’s because I was used to living in a quite countryside. Every day, I can hear the loud noise of the vehicles passing by and the commuters shouting on the road. I have to get used to that noise if I have to survive…hehe…There are so many things I have to learn here. For instance, I have to remember the water timing. I have to learn how to bargain with the local venders here since they tend to cheat the new faces.

The winter months are cool and my children are having lots of fun. They had made friends with the only neighbour we have (We reside in an enclosed cottage) for which I am grateful because they would have started nagging me about missing their old friends. And I have yet to learn where to shop. I haven’t had much time to go out since I got here but some of my old acquaintances have promised to take me out next week for orientation…

Of farewells and tears…

We all say that meeting and parting is the way of life, but when the reality strikes us, it still leaves us with a void feelings however prepared we are. I always shy away when it comes to biding farewell and I always wish for something to come up so that I could escape the farewell gathering. But I am not always lucky, I guess.

When my friends knew that I was planning to leave, they had quickly arranged a lunch for me. It was ladies get together. All the friends from my work place came to the gathering and we had a great time unlike the formal gathering. My principal wanted a formal gathering for the three of us who were leaving on transfer and he wanted me to be back to the school on the result day. I agreed on that since I wanted to meet my students before I left. But as luck would have it, I couldn’t keep my promise due to some unavoidable circumstances. And since I firmly believe that “God is great, whatever he does must be the best”, I trust that, I was not meant to be there on that gathering. I know that my friends are mad at me for not making to that gathering but I am glad that I didn’t make it because I always tend to shed tears on such occasion which is sometimes very embarrassing…

The aftermath of the tale of a destitute

The disaster had claimed the lives of many in her village. She did not know what to do. Her life had been completely shattered and she had no one whom she could call her own. She was all alone in the whole world. That night she slept beside her mother’s lifeless body, feeling delirious due to cold and shock at the turn of the events of her life.

The following morning, some people from her village saw her in critical condition and shifted her to the nearby health centre. She was well taken care by the health workers but she did not show any sign of recovering. It was as if she had given up the hope and wished to join her mother and her two siblings who were fished out from the debris by the people on the day she was taken to the hospital.

The people from the government came to survey the damage caused by the natural disaster and they took care of all the funeral rites for which she was grateful. They felt sorry for her and the others who shared similar fate but how could they know about the void caused by the death of their near ones. The relief aid started pouring into the village and people started rebuilding their lives once again. Zangmo tried to do the same but her heart did not belong to the village anymore. She wanted to be away from that place, away from the haunting memories. She wanted to escape but she also knew that she had never ventured from her village.
One day she received a package from the village head which had been sent by some school children in the west. There was a message scribbled on the cover. She did not know how to read so she asked someone to read it for her. The message read “You are not alone in your hours of distress; we are all there for you.” The child had written his address and a phone number on the package. Zangmo felt an urge to contact the boy and got the help from some people and called this boy. She learned that the boy lived with her mother who worked in an organization. Talking to the boy brought back the memories of her brothers and filled her eyes with tears. She missed them very much. The boy said that he would get in contact with her soon. Days dragged by and she felt that her life was slipping. She lost the zest for life and she looked gaunt and pale every passing day. She never went out of her hut that the relief worker had built for her. She sat silently and prayed…

Then, she heard a knock; she thought she might be hallucinating because the people had learned to leave her alone. No one bothered her anymore. But the knock continued, she reluctantly went to the door and opened it. She saw a stranger outside her door. On closer look, she saw a small boy of about 10 years with the stranger. The boy extended his hand and said, “Hi, remember me?” Zangmo gave him a confusing look, when the boy burst into laughter and said, “I told you I would get in touch with you and I have come to get you out of here.” At once the memory of the phone call flooded her and she felt embarrassed to have forgotten the boy who had sent her that package. He pointed to the woman with him and said “Meet my mother. We have come here to take you home”…

The tale of a destitute

It was a cold winter evening, everyone wrapped in old blankets sat around the fire, consuming every single heat the wood could produce. It was Zangmo, her ailing mother and her two younger siblings. They were so poor and on top of that the harsh winter could not let Zangmo find something to feed her family. Though just 17, she had to shoulder the entire responsibility of her house, for now her mother had been bed ridden for three weeks. Not to mention about the medicines, her mother could not even get good diet and every single day she was failing. Every groan produced by her ailing mother brought tears in her eyes.

That night she prayed, if only they were well-heeled, if only her mother got alright, if only the winter was over, if only….she went on until her tired eyes closed.

Sometimes she had a little hope, thinking may be one day the sufferings would all come to an end if a man would come and marry her, and look after her family. Although there was no man she knew who would fulfill her dreams, this brought a little comfort to her.

The weather was not going to change and she had to do something because just sitting there and hoping for a miracle to happen wasn’t working at all. So the next day, she prepared a pot of steaming pumpkin porridge for her mother and siblings and set off to find something better to eat for the family. She made her mom promise that she will take care of herself until she returned. Icy wind blew on her face reddening her cheeks and nose, freezing every inch of her weather-beaten body but she moved on.

Hours later she reached a cottage and saw an old woman carrying a bundle of wood on her shoulder and entering the house. She ran towards her and offered to work for her for a day if she would give her some rice in return. The old woman let her in and listened to her story. In the evening she was given three “phitas’ of rice and she returned home. On her way back, she heard a cry as if her mother was calling her. She thought she had imagined it but walked faster. As she neared her house she could see nothing due to smog, but then she heard a cry…a very similar cry of her mother she heard a few minutes ago. She ran towards it and to her fright, she saw her house reduced to rubble and her two siblings lying still, covered in blood, her mother trying to breathe hard. She reached her mother and tried to pull her out from the shackles of wood but could not. Soon her mother breathed last. Zangmo was stunned, she regretted for leaving her family alone, for not being able to rescue her mother, for being at the old woman’s place for a whole day, for not being able to talk to her siblings in their last moment, and she thought, “if only……….”

(Please note that this is a fictitious tale)

The haunted place

I usually don’t go out at night; the reason, I am scared of the dark. I pretend to be brave in front of others but only I know the truth. Whenever I go out, I can’t help thinking of those scenes from the horror movie and then I start getting frightened. Every time I have to go out at night, I take someone with me.

There is a particular place that gives me creepy thoughts. People say that some people have seen some shadows roaming around that area at night. I too believe that because I know that a couple of people had been cremated there including one of my student. As luck would have it I have to pass by that place everyday to work and back home.

Last year, one Saturday evening, I was out with friends for a badminton match. I stayed longer than I was supposed to and some friends promised that they would accompany me but when they reached the market, they had to stay back and I had to drive alone. When I reached that place I chanted prayers so loudly, I didn’t even hear the music that I was playing. When I reached home, I was all socked in sweat and got a hard look from my husband….

The Trek - II

It was after 5 O'clock in the evening. We had just finished our session when my friend suggested that we visit a monastery near by. I thought it would be fun so I eagerly agreed. We got out cell phones, a small bag to carry the incenses and offerings and asked someone to show us the way to the monastery.

We briskly walked through the village and came to an opening where we saw some cows grazing on the bountiful lush grass. We thought of taking some rest but our guide said that it would be too dark for us on our return trip, so we moved on. The monastery looked quite near but as we walked we realized that was not as near as we thought it would be.

It was almost dark and we had walked for more than two hours without rest when we finally reached the courtyard of the monastery. We requested the audience of the lama which was permitted.  We were even offered some tea and snacks. We kindly refused the invitation to dinner because by that time it was almost 8 O'clock in the evening. We took leave of and walked downhill to the school. We bumped on some stones on the way back. By the time we reached our destination, it was 9.30 pm and the teacher participants were waiting for us for dinner.

We felt guilty of having made them wait so late into the night and asked for apologies. When I finally climbed into the bed, my body was aching from the two days walk and some bruise on my knees from bumping on the stones on the way back in the dark.